I have had a busy day: meetings, lunch, a different place... And in the end, I have been so busy that I completely felt numb. When the day was over, I had this great epiphany.. Mostly, I use tango to escape from the numbness that I get from daily life. The lack of feeling, lack of meaningful connection, lack of contact. But sometimes, the opposite happens. When I find my self too involved in the life of tango, when tango seems to be taking over my life, reason, relationships, when it is taking a life of its own, and spiraling out of control, I use work, to cut down on the feeling consumption... I gradually lull my self back to numbness, until I finally can say: Frankly my dear I don't give a damn...
In a few days, the numbness will become pins and needles, and the urge to dance will become unbearable, and I will look at my tango shoes, and the mirror, and the shoes, and will put on my make up, and awaken my tango demons again and they will whisper:
Here's looking at you, kid..
"Mostly, I use tango to escape from the numbness that I get from daily life. The lack of feeling, lack of meaningful connection, lack of contact."
ReplyDeleteMe too.
Me too, most of the time. I never thought I would complain about feeling too much.:)
ReplyDeleteTango has this capacity to open all my senses to the world, and sometimes, I feel like I am coming out of darkness into light, and hte light is beautiful but hurts my eyes. Sometimes I cannot bear it. Thats all...